It’s Okay if You Want to Quit Sometimes

photo by D Sharon Pruitt

photo by D Sharon Pruitt

There will come a day, an hour, a moment when you say: “I’ve had enough.”

Who knows what may push you to the edge…another disappointment, someone cutting you off in traffic {or on the journey to your dreams}, opening the cupboard to find someone has taken the last cookie.

What’s important to know is that we all go to that place.

Even Jesus did in the Garden of Gethsemane before the cross when He said, “Let this cup pass from me…”

In other words, “I don’t want to be facing this right now.”

It’s human to grow weary.

It’s okay to want to give up.

It’s understandable to want to quit.

What matters isn’t avoiding those moments but instead learning to lean into them–or rather lean into the One who loves us.

“Yet not My will but Yours be done.”

When we tell ourselves, “I shouldn’t feel this way” then we cut ourselves off from the help we need.

Instead we can say, “I do feel this way. Now what do I need to get through this?”

It might be help from a friend.

It might be a reminder of Truth.

It might be a nap {yes, really}.

Fight the guilt. Fight the shame. Fight the temptation to believe no one else ever feels this way.

We all do.

And together with Jesus we will make it through.

XOXO

Holley Gerth

 

p.s. I recently talked to Bekah from the Mid-Morning show about God-sized Dreams, overcoming fear, {e}coaching and more. You can download the file and listen here {my segment starts at around the 22 minute mark and it’s about ten minutes long}.

Comments

  1. Thanks Holley- I can’t tell you how perfect the timing of this is. But it is.

  2. It’s helpful to know that we are not alone when we get to the place where we want to quit. Sometimes God allows us to get to that place because He knows that then, and only then, will we lean into Him. Thanks for the encouragement…
    Blessings,
    Bev

  3. Meaghan Weir says:

    You’re writing has been such a blessing to me. I recently read one of your books,You’re Already Amazing, and it was wonderful. I have a degree in marriage and family therapy and I have recommended that book to several people because it is exactly what I would want to say if I wrote a book like that! I found your blog through that book and I just love it! I pray that God continues to bless us with the words He is putting in your heart!

  4. Oh, how timely. I woke up to find that my adopted daughter , whom I love with ALL my heart, has stolen from me again during the night. Disappointed again. Frustrated beyond belief. Do I feel like giving up? yeah.

    • So, she has run away?

      • Oh no, Becca, she hasn’t run away. She has Reactive Attachment Disorder and as a result, she doesn’t trust. She sneaks out of her room at night and steals things. I find them in the morning under her bed,under her pillow, or other places. It’s frustrating. I want her heart to heal and I get so disappointed every time this happens. I have a picture of her and I on my blog today…www.pateandbirdie.com

  5. Thank you for this perfectly timed message. I can only believe that God must have spoke through you. I am at that breaking point, and I am barely scraping by. Sometimes I worry God doesn’t hear me, and I feel so guilty for those thoughts. I ask, please, if you could extend a short prayer on my behalf, it would be appreciated. I have a mental illness that has engulfed my entire life right now, and I am seeing life through that murky perspective.

    • Karen E. L. says:

      Becca
      Hi! As I read your comment, just now, I heard in my
      spirit, a statement Corrie tenBoom made many
      years ago, as she had been in a concentration
      camp for hiding Jews in her home:
      “There is no pit too deep, but what God is deeper still!”
      Be blessed, today, and know that He is below your
      deepest and murkiest feelings! (Mine, too.)
      Shalom. your sister, Karen

      • Thank you for that reminder, Karen. Wow! It’s a good one. Praying for you, Becca. Peace, joy and comfort to you as you fix your eyes, heart and mind on Jesus, the Author and Finisher of our faith. His love for you is great and deep. He is so very good. CLING! Cling to Jesus, Our Father God, and the Holy Spirit.

      • Thank you Karen for sharing those words!!

    • Stephanie says:

      Becca
      I just read your post and stopped immediately to pray for you. Jesus will hold you, He will love you forever and ever. There IS NO PLACE where He can’t find you. HE is with YOU. Please know that. I felt such a powerful spirit when I prayed for you just now and that doesn’t always happen to me. He wants me to tell you He’s coming. He’s there. And you’re going to be okay.

      I pray many, many blessings for you dear Becca. Be strong…the Lord Himself fights for you.

    • Becca,just prayed for you. May you feel the Lord’s PRESENCE and PEACE today. I have a chronic vestibular disorder that tries to Run my life. I understand your frustration. Remember the Lord understands exactly how you feel each moment of everyday. It helps knowing that Jesus understands when no one else understands. I Love this verse…..He tends His flock ( you and me) like a shepherd . He gathers the lambs in His arms and carries them( you and me) close to His heart. Isaiah 40:11

      • Nancy, what a beautiful verse! I hope it continues to soothe you in your times of need. I deeply appreciate your prayers. I feel so overwhelmed with outpouring of support. I feel truly blessed! Thank you everyone!

    • Becca – praying for you. You are not alone! We are promised that God will never leave us or forsake us. You are HIS PRECIOUS child and He LOVES YOU! Hugs my sister!

    • I have lived in that murky perspective and I know God was there. I love Romans 8, because it is there that Paul tells us that “the Holy Spirit prays for for us in groanings too deep for words”, that “all things work together for good to those who love God and are called according to His purpose”, and that absolutely Nothing, not anything can separate us from His love, from Him. I have felt very alone, as if I were in a prison, but not anymore. Praying for you, Becca. You are loved.

  6. Yes, I do want to quit too sometimes when it all seems far too much for me. But, then, after a night’s sleep, I find strength again in the LORD and move on. Life is not that easy if we have responsibilities. It’s tough some of the time. Then the next day, it always gets better and I plod on. Another day LORD, I say to myself. And HE says, Good morning, MY child. And off we go. hahahahaha Such is the life of a believer.

  7. Tamara L says:

    Amen. This was so helpful today as my sister was feeling like this so I’ve just sent her your words Holley to let her know we all share these feelings from time to time but help is at hand and only a prayer away … as long as we listen.

  8. Thank you Holley, I had one of those days yesterday. My daughter, Emma got a rejection letter from the University she wanted to attend. ( We have been praying she will attend the college/ University where the Lord wants her to be.) Disappointment at the tender age of 17 is difficult. I told her not to look at herself through the eyes of the college, but as God sees you. God sees all your potential and His plan is best for your life.

  9. Karen E. L. says:

    Holley, thank you for this message today, in light of the
    Passover coming up, soon, and the Remembrance of
    the Lamb Who was slain, for the sins of the World.
    If He didn’t give up, who am I to do so?
    How I rejoice today that He didn’t let the cup pass from Him.
    He prayed. And still prays for us, today, as He sees how
    very difficult it is for us down here.

  10. Holley, your blog is such a blessing to me. I have been on a journey, in search of my God Sized Dream. Sometimes it feels so close but most of the time so far. I have been working at my dream for over 15 years but recently I began (about 60 days ago) to commit myself to covering myself in God’s word and seeking his face. I am becoming more and more dependant on the need for the noursishment that his word is providing. Your blog is part of my nourshishment. And I am amazed everytime that I open your blog that you have just the words to encourage and give me the faith to keep on working toward my dream. One day you spoke of our dreams not turning out exactly like we imagine, but to have faith that God knows what is best for us. I am still a very long way from seeing the dream come to life. And sometimes I really think I should just give up. I just wanted to thank you for your constant dedication to bring each serving of hope. Learning to love the Lord with all of our Heart and Soul and Mind is what God wants from each of us. I have been a Christian for many many years but for the first time I am truly laying down my life and seeking the perfect Will of God, even if it turns out differently than my vision. God is showing me things in unbelievable ways.
    Thanks again for the blessing you give to all of us out here.

  11. Thank you for this Message, There have been times I have wanted to give up and walk away from things, as I sat and cried about it and thought about how much pain and hardship I was going thur I would always hear Don’t get weary in well doing and I would get up and go back to taking care of Mom with noone else pitching in and helping me take a baby sister with Mental Illiness,seeing about the grandkids,while daughter works,yes Holly you do get tired and want to give up,I think about taking a rest at one point i felt this is not please to God,but then I remembered Jesus when the crowd was pressing in to him and got in a boat and went across the river to take a rest. So now when I feel that way I find me a resting place and take that time to refresh.

    vicki

  12. MARY THOMAS says:

    Dear Holley, You are really a wonderful woman. Your words are life-giving. Go on.

  13. MARY THOMAS says:

    Dear Holley, Your words are always amazing. Lifts me up to newness. I feel empowered to soar to the heights. I am working on my M.Phil dissertation. I have lot of work. Sorry for writing little. Pray for me that I may finish my work soon. There are some impediments.
    I will make sure to read your great messages every day. Thanks.

  14. susan miller says:

    I opened this as I sat at my computer and wept with pain and frustration. My body is betraying me and threatening to take away most of what matters to me…my ability to follow my grandchildren sports games, my duties as a wife and mother, my job as a social worker and my joy. God put me together in my mama’s womb with only one hip. My right him was completely absent and for years I’ve endured surgeries, hip replacements, wheelchairs, walkers, canes and stares. Its always been okay because I was moving to a higher calling. BUT NOW…..the pain is intolerable…..the doctors say it is too risky to operate due to other health concerns that have arisen over the past few years, including an aortic aneurysm which require replacing my ascending aorta and aortic valve, and I am ready to give up. I pray, my friends pray, my daughters friends pray, my Church prays……I’m so tired. Each step is unbelievably painful and I am beginning to fail at doing my jobs…..all of them. Please lift me up in prayer. I want wisdom, peace, and joy. I need to hear the voice of God….even if he tells me that His grace is sufficient for me.

    • Susan, it must be so hard for you. I pray for the pain to cease, and pray for you to live the life you so deserve.

    • Susan, After reading your post, the Lord gave me some scriptures for you, that help me as I struggle with a chronic vestibular problem that even the doctors don’t even understand! But I know Jesus understands everything! I will be praying for you !

      1Peter 5:10-11
      And the God of all Grace, who called you to His eternal glory in Christ,
      after you have “suffered” a little while, will (Himself) restore you and make (you) strong, firm and steadfast! To Him be the Power forever and ever.

      Isaiah 49:13
      For the Lord comforts His people,
      and will have compasson on His afflicted ones.

      Psalm 34:18
      The Lord is close to the brokenhearted
      and saves those who are crushed in spirit.
      verse 19
      The righteous may have many troubles, but the Lord delivers them from them all.

      2Thessalonians 3:16
      Now may the Lord of Peace ( Jesus) himself give you PEACE at all times and in everyway.

      Feel the Lord’s Presence and His peace which flows out of it.
      Your Sister in Christ
      Nancy

  15. Holley, thanks for the reminder that its okay to feel bit lost when we hear some bad news and not to feel guilty because I’m not supposed to feel ‘this way.’ I will remember and lean on Jesus for help and love.

  16. Words of wisdom! Holley, you are my personal cheerleader. Rah, rah, rah! I need encouragement and that you are. Thank you! We have all heard the saying Let Go, Let God, which was my motto for many years and now I have a new saying “I’m not giving up, I’m giving in to God. Giving in to God knowing his plans are much more than mine. Again, thank you for your writings, they really give me inspiration. Now my question to you is – Who gives you encouragement? May God bless those who do.

  17. Thank you Holley for your faithfulness and I’m so amazed at God’s timing with this message. I am in a place right now where the thought of “quiting” seems to be an every minute contemplation. I’m feeling very drained in my ministry and I admit I have been getting messages from God but it seems like every time I get a message from him then I also get a discouragement from someone else! What I really grasped onto in your message is that it’s ok to feel this way, to feel the guilt of thinking of quiting, to feel the frustration and hurt that is leading me to that place of throwing in the towel and to realize I need help! I have been reaching out this week, some of the responses have been good and some not so good but I know I’m probably also making some people feel uneasy as they never expected my honesty I do appreciate your message and the reminder that even Jesus wanted to have the struggles taken from Him. I’ll be leaning on Jesus and thanking him for you Holley and the way you allow Jesus to communicate through you. Blessings!

  18. God is Good in HIS perfect timing… in using you to share such a wonderful message and at a time when I know some that are hurting and feel this way. Thank you so much for your full and honest messages!!

  19. msurrency says:

    Exactly what I needed to hear today! Thank you.

  20. Holley:
    Your posts almost always touch me in some ways. I have so much going on in my life that I have prayed many times for peace and help. He is the greatest one to give me strength to get thru each day. Your words just show how God can talk to you through other people. Thank you.

  21. Thank you for your willingness to show us to lean into Jesus. I just finished Do What You Can Plan. It’s helped me to pic up some good habits even though i’m not doing every thing. I’ve improved and that encourages me to do more.

  22. Beautiful… bless you for sharing

  23. Holley, thank you so much for your words of encouragement. It is exactly what I needed to hear. In Numbers 6:24-26. The Lords bless you and watch , guard, and keep you; The Lord make His face to shine and enlighten you and be gracious and giving to you; The Lord lift up His approving countenance upon you and give you peace. This is for all the beautiful and wonderful ladies on this blog. Remember God’s Got It. Have a beautiful and blessed day everyone!

  24. Thanks cause that me ..I am so very down.

  25. Found these words on Facebook, from a dear spiritual mentor and sister: Stay with is. Stay there.

    And a weight moved from my shoulders. Later she would tell me of the writers in the Bible, how they wrote under divine inspiration with no real grasp on the audience that those words would reach.

    This is freeing to know. And I feel a real release to perform for God and simply participate with God.

  26. Totally needed this reminder today. Thank you.

  27. Thanks to everyone for sharing so honestly..I recently felt to be in a seemingly foreign place in my walk with Christ. I found myself repeating to others “I just don’t know what’s wrong, I feel like I have lost a vital connection; I have never been in this place before where I feel so far from God” and I believe it had stemmed from multiple disappointment over the past so many years and problems that seem to have no resolution in sight.

    Prayer has always been a vital outlet and blessing- and yet I found myself utterly speechless when I would go before God.. All I could do, at best- was cry, cry and cry. Words would not come and I could not even journal my prayers- which for me- was unbelievable as I enjoy writing so much. The guilt, shame and fear of being in such a place only amplified the pain and kept the weight upon my heart.

    And that is why our brothers and sisters in Christ are so wonderful!.. To stand in that gap! To stand by our side and commit to seeing us through the valley..To remind us of how good our Heavenly Father is-and remind us how much we are loved.. And once again, the eyes of the heart will open…problems may not yet be resolved, disappoint may still lurk.. but to be able to see the face of our Heavenly Father and to be able to hear His voice.. when the heart cries out–”What more have I need of!!” There is nothing greater or grander than being as a helpless child in the gracious, loving , capable hands of a Father who loves us no matter how we are feeling; Living as the redeemed daughter of the High King of Heaven..

    .”I lift up mine eyes unto the hills..from whence cometh my help..My help comes from the Lord.. The Maker of heaven and earth..” and another favorite ..”Mourning may last for a night, but joy cometh in the morn…”

    Blessings to all..Prayers abound! Your friend and sister in Christ, Lisa

  28. Carolyne says:

    Yeah I want to quite, life is too painful

  29. God’s timing is perfect. I said those exact words this morning. I am so tired and exhausted and feel like everything is closing in on me. I sat and cried as I read your post and took a deep deep breath as I said it was ok for me to feel this way. God is with me every step, every day but this week in particular has rattled me to the depth of my being. Thank you for reminding me that God is in control even when I forget. God Bless you.

  30. Holley, you have no idea how this message helped me today ! For the past several weeks, anything and everything that could be complicated, frustrating, exasperating and just plain nuts was. I kept praying, as I always do, but it seemed like God was on vacation and too busy to listen to me. I know now that I was wrong. Thank you a million times for reminding me that He will lead me in the right direction ! God Bless you !

  31. Thanks for the reminder that we are not alone when we have feelings like these – and that we can always talk it over with the Lord who knows how it feels. He will help us sort them out and go through them victorious. Thank you for being a blessing!

  32. I was going to try and capture the magnitude of the impact your words had on me yesterday, but it seems I’m in good company. As usual, God is using your words to speak straight to my heart and shine His light into my own dark cave. Thanks … well, the words don’t suffice. But praying God will bless your socks of in reward for your continued obedience. Amazed by our Great and Awesome, loving-me-in-my-weakness God.

  33. Anita Owen says:

    I felt this way today Holly! I actually did find away too, this just confirmed to me that I did the right thing. I like what you said in the end too – “we all feel that way at times, I am not alone”. I heard myself saying negative things in my head so bad, how I just wanted to quit (my job) and walk away. With a little help from my coworkers and PRAYER, I got back on track and finished up what I needed to do. Praise the LORD!

  34. I have been pushing against odds for two years, and sometimes wonder, “Am I supposed to be doing something else? Please, God. Redirect me if I’m headed in the wrong direction.” So far I have not felt the pull elsewhere. What I have received is affirmation from others to press on. You’d think that positive encouragement would quiet the voice that says, “Quit– your dream is pie in the sky. Give it up!” It doesn’t. So, here I am, acknowledging that I do want to quit sometimes. But, you, Holley, have taken away the stigma of such a statement. It’s OK, and together with other strugglers, we will make it through, because our powerful, always-in-control God is on our side.

  35. HIt the nail on the head this morning Holly! Been chiuagha sitting over the weekend. My next dream step is just 2 days away and fear has hit once again. Very helpful to have that visual picture of my little buddie nipping at my heels. Very helpful to normalize that fear will be part of this process. Trusting God each day and knowing he goes before us. Blessings

  36. Like all the others who have posted, I feel your words were directed to me personally. I’m sitting here on Easter week, watching the snow pile up and trying not to feel sorry for myself. Three years ago my husband passed away, 2 years ago my home was flooded and I am still not back living there. But now I feel that it’s OK to feel that way but now I’m motivated to move into action and not dwell on what I lost, but be thankful for all the blessings God has given me! Thank you!

  37. This is the right blog for anyone who really wants to understand this topic.
    You know so much its almost hard to argue with you (not that I actually wikl need to…HaHa).
    You definitely put a brand new spin on a subject which has been written about for a long time.

    Excellent stuff, just wonderful!

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