Your favorite flavor of ice cream

photo by stevendepolo

I’m a little girl standing on tip-toes to peer into the shiny case in front of me. I can hardly believe my eyes.


Mint chocolate chip.

Rocky road.

I point at last and my selection comes to me on that wonder of wonders–the waffle cone.

My friend picks something else. I shrug my shoulders, not my flavor. It doesn’t change our friendship. It doesn’t make me look at her differently. It doesn’t cause me to sit at a table across the room.

Yet somehow as we grow up, we can forget to approach life that way.

We make our choices and then declare that the whole world must love Mint Chocolate Chip as much as we do. If they don’t, we dismiss or belittle or try to persuade.

But here’s the deal: it’s just not our flavor of ice cream.

Now, I’m not talking about absolute truth here. That’s a whole different post. I’m talking about preferences. Things that make up who we are that really have no black and white answers.

Whether we’re a night owl or morning lark.

Introvert or extrovert.

What kind of music we like.

The style of home decor we prefer.

Even some of the ways we pursue our faith.

When we run into someone or something who’s not our flavor of ice cream we tend to ask one of two questions: What’s wrong with me? or What’s wrong with them?

But neither one is helpful…or even necessary.

Instead we need to find that little girl inside us again–the one who saw past flavors to the heart. Then we can shrug our shoulders and say, “Oh, well, not my flavor of ice cream.” So we sit down at the table again and embrace each other anyway.

Because we’re really more alike than different.

People are always more important than preferences.

And, it’s love that makes life truly sweet.


  1. says

    Beautifully said Holley. I’m a natural truth-teller, and it took me years and much heartache to realize that truth without love (and love without truth) just doesn’t work. I have to work hard to see the gray, but once I started looking for more color, the world got so much more beautiful.

  2. Judy Delperdang says

    Thank you for reinforcing what’s been on my heart this morning. You have a God-given way of doing that. Much love and blessings to you, Holley.

  3. Leanna says

    Thanks Holley!
    My FB status yesterday afternoon was this:
    “Know what’s great? God doesn’t compare us to others…maybe we should stop comparing as well.”
    Our walk, no matter how different it is from someone else’s doesn’t mean it’s wrong (as long as we aren’t intentonally sinning and all that- that’s different)
    God created us differently for reasons, just like there are all the different ice cream flavors.
    We all need a little varity!

  4. Joyce Gentzler says

    Flavors of ice cream. Wow, what a great way to describe our personalities and differences. I think I may look at some people a bit differently now. Maybe I will find a “Peaches and Cream” person, just like me or maybe not. It makes me aware of just how unimportant our differences are. Sometimes if we look below the differences, we find the most wonderful people.

  5. says

    This made me smile and there’s so much truth to it…
    The different perspectives and layers and shapes and hues and textures make God’s Creation so much more beautiful and interesting.
    And sometimes our flavor choices change over the years as well…and that’s okay too (aside from the non-negotiables).
    I used to choose Bubblegum with the pieces of real gum in it…now I’m more of a PB & Chocolate or Mint Choc. Chip.

  6. says

    Can you imagine what it would be like in this world with only ONE flavor? How drab and dull!
    One color, one flower, one tree…Instead God gave us “one unique” of everything. No other person is exactly like the other, nor animal, plant, and on into infinity. What an awesome God!

    Thank you for the loving look at our individuality.

  7. Tina says

    My ice cream is chocolate!! Creamy comfort!!
    I liked this post and reading the replies!!
    Blessings to you all, my beautiful sisters!!

  8. Sonja says

    Amen!! i have thought this same thing so many times over the years!! But the Lord has blessed you with a way with words! Love the mental picture! :-) Thank you!!

  9. Beth says

    Thank you Holley! God used you to speak to my heart today. The past two week I’ve endured a barrage of attacks from my “Christian” friends because of my political beliefs. Yes, I am a Democrat and yes there are a large number of us Liberals who are also devoted Christians. I accept that we have different beliefs and think that those differences are okay. I don’t understand why Christians can be so mean-spirited. God loves all of us. Your posting today was like a big hug from God. He loves me and accepts me for who I am and does not have a problem with my political position. I hope that my friends on the political right are also reading your post today.

  10. Dolores E. Green says

    :)) Very GOOD Holly..Very Good :)) I just love you and all the ladies ….I cannot express right now what i think so in all goodness I will save it for later..:))


  11. Joni says

    Holley, Your thoughts today are so relevant (to us women especially), because I think we do a lot of “comparisons”, which is mostly comparing ourselves, our children, our lives, to others. We need to be gentler with ourselves, and constantly remind each other of that.

  12. says

    Reading blogs definitely helped broaden my horizons on this subject of “its okay to not like the same flavor”. I would read a blog and be so inspired by it then find out something about that person that didn’t jive with what I was TOLD was a black and white issue and it challenged me to reconsider what I was being TOLD. I have learned that just because a person [insert something people tend to judge people over] it didn’t make them ‘less of a Christian’ or their faith not ‘real’. I am thankful to have met so many different flavors of bloggers who are chasing after Christ in ways that are so diverse.
    Thank you for this post.

  13. says

    Such a powerful reminder especially in the midst of a such a polarized hostile political climate!! Well I won’t go into that…
    My favorite ice cream is butter pecan, with fudge, malted milk powder, and whipped cream. Yum! If I have to pick a single flavor though…Chocolate Peanut Butter. I just love your heart Holley. So loving and kind. And so accepting of diversity. I so agree, let’s just allow each other our preferences. There is so much to be learned from one another. So much lost through closing our minds and shutting down our hearts because we don’t agree. Jesus loves so lavishly…I want to be more like Him. The command is definitely not, “Love your neighbor when you agree with everything they think, believe, say, and choose.” Bless you!

  14. Dorothy says

    There is one Truth which we cannot compromise….. we must be narrow-minded: Jesus said, “I am the Way, the Truth, and the Light….” He is the way, the only way, to the Father…. Following this Truth can bring on a lot of persecution…. it certainly brought much persecution to Jesus!

  15. says

    As a little girl I was in a loving family where we were always with people with our same interests/ religion/ incomes. I always treasured my freedom to choose any flavor of ice cream I wanted. Now in my later years I treasure the many different friends/ neighbors/ & people I meet with “different flavors” that add so much color to my life. Thank you, always, for your wonderful sharing insights Holley!

  16. Alta says

    I hope I’ve read your story right, Holley. If so, it matches what we’re hearing from people from born again Christians all around us – no matter where we worship, if we are born again (Romans 10:9-10), we make up the body of Christ. It no longer matters if you have bible fellowship in our homes, raise our hands praising God in a building, listen to different Christian teachers (listen to a song by John Kano addressing this). How great is this that we’re all “waking up” to the fact that Christ is the head of this body, and we each have a part to play as the body (fingers, toes, arms, legs, etc.)? We love our Abba Father and His son is our Lord Jesus
    Christ. What a beautiful family we have!

  17. Terri says

    Thanks, Holley, for the reminder of how great innocence can be, or better yet, a child like faith. I am going to try and really remember my favorite ice cream, which is rocky road by the way, isn’t everyone’s favorite!

  18. Becky Jones says

    I love ice cream. And I love most flavors. It truly be a boring world if we only had vanilla. The past few weeks we have going to Chattanooga for radiation treatments and when I get out of there I want a cone of McDonalds vanilla. They say it doesn’t make your mouth dry but sure gets dry and that ice cream just hits the spot. Enjoy your blog.

  19. Ruth says

    I always enjoy your little stories..guess they are blogs.Right?
    You used ice cream as your subject. That just happens to be my weekness..anything but chocolate.But I love chocolate Chip.Plain cho. is nasty to me.YUCK !
    Any one else can choose what they like even choc. As long as I don’t have to eat it.
    I love people & their opinions are theirs & I will listen to them.But I have learned that 2 subjects are better kept private: Politics and religion.Too controversial. But Christianity is didfferent..

  20. says

    Hallelu ~YAH! He is so Awesome, and to think that each one of us is made
    in His Image is almost too Wonderful to think on! I marvel that none of the
    people ever made, since Adam and Eve, look exactly alike and to this day,
    if my husband were to call me from any where in the World, I would know
    his voice: all voices are different. Even dogs and cats are all different.
    And snowflakes…and leaves, and Every Thing that Yahweh made. He said
    “It is Good.” So are we. This is so excellent today because each ice cream
    flavor is different, and special and good. Each person Yah created is special to
    Him; no matter what we have done, He loves us and wants to forgive us and
    be our Father, our Creator. Now, I’m just all wound up, Holley, and all
    excited and: Hungry for Ice Cream! xo

  21. says

    Seriously wanting some vanilla soft serve in a waffle cone right about now!
    Aside from that, I find myself judging other mamas quite often. Moms who are strangers and moms that are friends of mine…even ones I am related to! I feel guilty about it when I realize, like you say, “just not my flavor of ice cream.” And that’s okay! It’s totally okay to have different preferences. It’s even something that we could and should celebrate and embrace more often. (Now I am off to get some ice cream…while it’s not vanilla soft serve in a waffle cone, it will be a scoop of vanilla in a plastic bowl!)

  22. Theresa says

    I don’t normally post here, but this is a wonderful message that really spoke to me and a relationship issue going on between who used to be friends of mine, but who chose to break ties because I wouldn’t conform to their expectations of what a friend should be or how I should act. In a nutshell, they couldn’t accept me as I am – the person God created me to be.
    It’s so sad because I know that isn’t how God intended the friendships to be. But they couldn’t accept my “flavor”…which just happens to be chocolate chip cookie dough

  23. Valerie Hohenberger says

    Oh Holley, After working to lose over 100 pounds over the last 3 years, I now choose low fat frozen yougurt rather that ice cream…my favorite flavor is carmel pretzel. Just a little salty with the sweetness of the carmel. I have just changed my flavor of choice.

  24. judy h. says

    You’re right Holley! When my children were growing up and questioning each other’s ideas or choices or began to criticize their friends for the way the did things; I’d always look at them and say, ” If everyone was the same, liked the same things and did everything the same, wouldn’t we live in a boring world.” They tease me about that now every time I request vanilla ice cream in a plain cake cone. I hear, “Oh Mom, you are SO boring!”

  25. says

    ‘Ya gotta love our Creator! After all He’s the one who designed all of us! And He is so incredibly creative! Let’s follow His creativity and enjoy every flavor “in Christ”.

  26. says

    This was a “yummy” blog, Holley!!

    Yup, so liberating!! That I just need to be the me that God wants me to be!! Easiest and most “flavorful” way to live!

    And take time to enjoy all the other flavors God created, too!

  27. says

    This is wonderful Holley – especially right at this time. We can so easily get caught up defending our preferences. We just aren’t all going to agree on everything.
    Have a great weekend.

  28. Sandy. says

    Just Waking Up.
    Sharing this Morning Devotional.
    Waiting for Coffee.
    Psalm 143:10
    “Teach me to do your will,
    for you are my God;
    may your good Spirit lead me on
    level ground.”

  29. Lisa Mauldin says

    you touch my heart so much!! thank you for allowing God to use you to reach our hearts and to remind us of God’s truths instead of man’s.
    blessings on you,
    lisa :)


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