Trying to be perfect always makes us less of who we are. #YoureLovedNoMatterWhat

Sometimes when I speak at events, the organizers have women do scavenger hunts through their purses as a fun way to start the evening. A woman from the stage calls out random items: “four or more tubes of lipstick,” “thirty-two cents in change,” and “driver’s license that’s about to expire.”

The first person to find that item wins. Purses are pulled out from under tables, and in the chaos contents are thrown everywhere. Pacifiers. Calendars. Receipts. Wrappers. Tissues. Mirrors. By the time the activity is done, the table is covered with visual reminders of how busy and complicated a woman’s life can be.

If you’re like me, much of what would come out of your purse would be related in some way to trying to be perfect. I’ve gone through seasons when my calendar felt full of things I felt obligated to do because it helped me meet some standard. My ever-present, ever-being-reapplied makeup is an attempt at our culture’s version of beauty. The receipts you would have found might show purchases that were more about making an impression than what I really wanted.

Carrying all of that can begin to weigh a girl down. But Jesus walks up beside us and offers this instead:

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light (Matt. 11:28–30).

Jesus wants us to trade our purses of “perfection” for a much lighter load instead.

He offers us security in place of striving.

Full hearts instead of full schedules.

Receiving instead of trying to buy our way to acceptance.

A local store has a “trade your purse” day once a year. No matter what shape your bag is in, you can bring it in and get credit so you can walk out with a new one. Inevitably, women walk out with lighter loads than before. It’s interesting what happens when they do: their shoulders are straighter and they walk taller. Jesus offers us the same. We don’t have to carry the expectations of others. We don’t have to go through life slumped over because we always feel like we’re falling short. We don’t have to fill our lives with what will ultimately make us feel empty.

We can carry less when we become convinced we’re cared for more than we can even imagine.


Holley Gerth

Books to encourage you...



Jill Newman’s Instagram picture put me in some pretty fabulous company last week!

Welcome to the Coffee for Your Heart weekly link-up! You’re an encourager so I’m asking you to pour out a little love with your words every Wednesday {link-up goes live at 5:30am CST}. Simply write an encouraging blog post and then share it here. Don’t have a blog? You can still write an encouraging comment. If you’re reading this by email, go to to see all the fun and join in too.

Giveaway and Optional Writing Prompt: For the next few weeks, the Wednesday posts are going to be about getting free from the pressure to be perfect. I’ll have an optional writing prompt for you about that topic. If you write about it, link up and include my new book You’re Loved No Matter What: Freeing Your Heart from the Need to Be Perfect in your post somewhere, you’ll be entered to win a God’s Heart for You necklace {U.S. residents only}. Thanks to DaySpring for providing the necklaces! Congratulations to Susan Shipe for winning last week! If you don’t have a blog, you can share today’s post on Facebook, leave a comment here saying you did and answer the prompt in your comment.

The prompt for today was: Where have you seen beauty from brokenness?

Next Wednesday’s prompt is: What do you need to lay down or take out of your “purse”?

Pretty please use this button in your blog post so others can easily join in with us {html code in right sidebar}. And when you link up your post, take a moment to leave an encouraging comment on the one that’s linked up just before yours. Thanks, friends!

{Click to tweet that you’re joining me here today!}

About Holley

About Holley

Wall Street Journal Bestselling Author and Life Coach

I like humans, words, and good coffee. And I’d love to help you beat what’s holding you back, become all you’re created to be, and kick butt for the greater good.

Cheering you on,


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