What if I told you that your awkward moments can make you more likeable? (If you’d like a real-life example of an awkward moment, watch this video of me recording The Powerful Purpose of Introverts audiobook yesterday! Ha!)
Many introvert have confided to me that they fear getting tongue-tied while trying to make small talk or making a mistake in a social situation. But one of the most interesting things I discovered while doing research for the book is that awkwardness can actually strengthen our relationships. Here are three things you need to know…
1 Feeling awkward means people matter to us. Daniel Goleman, a bestselling author and science journalist says, “We are wired to connect. Neuroscience has discovered our brain’s design makes it sociable, inexorably drawn into an intimate brain-to-brain linkup whenever we engage with another person.”
2 Sweating, stuttering, blushing, or other signs of social nervousness can actually make others see us as more trustworthy. Mark Leary, a psychology professor at Duke University, says responses like these are “necessary to signal that I care what you think about me.” About people who never express such responses, he says, “You couldn’t trust them.”
3 Psychologist Barbara Markway agrees with this perspective on awkwardness. “We think that people are going to reject us, but it can be endearing,” she says. When our discomfort shows, we’re expressing two things: “You matter to me” and “You’re not the only one.”
Fear might tempt us to hide, but it’s not too late to show up. Insecurity might point out our imperfections, but grace invites us to come as we are. Shame might tell us to try harder, but our worth is an unearned gift.
Let’s dare to keep connecting, one awkward moment at a time! Are you with me?
Cheering you on,
Holley
p.s. That video was only one of many awkward moments I had yesterday while recording my audiobook! But it was worth it for YOU! And great news–you can get the audiobook FREE (along with my brand new mini-course and an introvert strengths assessment–what?!) when you preorder The Powerful Purpose of Introverts. Don’t miss out, it’s only for a limited time!
