The Rest of Your Story 20: How do you compare?

Lollipops photo by D Sharon Pruitt (flickr) It’s a junior high lunch table. We eavesdrop on giggly girls…

“My boyfriend is captain of the football team.”

“I found THE COOLEST JEANS last weekend!”

“I got an A on the Science test.”

Is anyone else’s heart racing just thinking about being back there. Good grief.

Okay, I’ve regained my composure. The point is that as women we compare. A lot.

We tend to berate ourselves for this tendency. But really, I just think it’s part of how we’re wired.

Women were created by God to be inherently relational. This means we’re always checking in, asking ourselves, “How’s she doing? How’s she doing? How’s SHE doing?”

This is a reflection of our tender hearts and compassionate natures. It’s a beautiful thing that makes us excellent mamas, wives, and friends.

Where we get tripped up is when we follow that first question with, “How am I doing compared with her?”

Hold up. That’s not helpful.

If we fall short, then we’re insecure.

If we’re doing better, then we’re prideful.

If her life seems harder, then we don’t feel entitled to our pain.

God’s answer? Focus on your own story.

In a biblical passage I find a bit funny (it’s okay to think that, right?), Jesus and Peter are having a heart-to-heart. Another disciple walks up and in his typical style, Peter asks, “What about him, Lord?” Jesus has an even better question, “What is that to you?” And then, “As for you, follow me.” (John 21)

Your story belongs to you. God doesn’t compare it (or you) to anyone else and you don’t have to either.

Big sigh of relief.

So as write the rest of our stories together (and live them out with others), let’s go for these three steps: share, care, prayer. And skip the compare.

(Unless you get THE COOLEST JEANS on sale. Comparing prices totally doesn’t count. You’d better reveal the deal, sister. I’m just saying…)

p.s. I’m leaving today for Blissdom, a blogging conference in Nashville. I’m so excited about seeing some of you in person! It does tend to bring out those Junior High insecurities, so I’d appreciate your prayers. (: I’ll be praying for you too! Did you see my prayer for you yesterday?

There will still be new posts each day and I’ll be checking in!


TODAY’S QUESTION: What is God doing in YOUR story right now?

Every comment during the challenge = an entry for $50 to, including the (in)courage shop!

Are you a blogger? Every Friday we’ll have a “Rest of Your Story” round-up! 

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About Holley

About Holley

Wall Street Journal Bestselling Author and Life Coach

I like humans, words, and good coffee. And I’d love to help you beat what’s holding you back, become all you’re created to be, and kick butt for the greater good.

Cheering you on,


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